She was the one who started it. “Looks like we have everything in common.” That was her opener, not mine. And for a minute, I believed it.
But here’s what happened: silence. Long gaps. I would initiate, and often there was no response at all. And when I finally pulled back, I got labeled ‘impatient.’
Impatient? No. Just unwilling to be someone’s Plan B.
In healthcare, we’re trained for this. You don’t tell a patient, “I don’t have time.” You say, “I’ll be back in an hour.” Even if you’re slammed, you give them a frame. That’s basic respect. It keeps them from lying there, wondering if you’re coming back at all.
Dating isn’t so different. If you’re too busy to talk, fine. Just say so. A simple “I’ll reply later” goes a long way. It’s not about constant availability. It’s about courtesy.
And if you find yourself always the one initiating, always waiting, always wondering? That’s not a relationship. That’s you being a placeholder. A backup plan. Plan B.
And if you realize you’re Plan B? Accept it. Walk away. Don’t fight for a seat in someone else’s waiting room.
Because silence is an answer. And sometimes the cleanest move you can make is hearing it for what it is.
That’s the Gotham City truth.